I have been chasing a girl for a long time, but her attitude is neither proactive nor rejecting. What should I do in this situation?
1. Confirm your feelings after breaking the distance
What is the most important thing about chasing a girl?
Understand her little thoughts. Under normal circumstances, girls do not Taking the initiative and not refusing, there are only three situations:
1) I don’t like it and want to calm down
2) I don’t dislike it, but I can keep it
3) I like it, but I have concerns
No matter what her little thoughts are, all we have to do is create opportunities, quickly break through her safe distance, and see her reaction.
For example, organize a group activity, camping, amusement park, escape room, etc., and you invite her to go with you, then Such group activities also reduce the chance of her rejecting you.
During the process, create some opportunities to be alone, be more careful, help her take care of her, and treat her more differently anyway.
If a girl refuses to be alone with you, or refuses your help many times, and her interest wanes, then send her away!
Facts have proved that breaking through the safe distance fails. One or two rejections may mean that you are embarrassed, but multiple rejections may mean that you really don't like it.
But if you get along fairly well, it can be a preliminary proof that she is very likely to have a good impression of you. At this time, if you get along more and get to know each other more, and open your heart, you will basically be able to nailed it.
2. Use the "Veblen Effect" skillfully
The "Veblen Effect" is placed on feelings Here, to put it simply, it is our positioning of ourselves, and the value displayed is different depending on the level of positioning. Only when the value is high, others will rush for it.
In other words, if you only want to please, then girls will classify you as a "cheap commodity."
What we have to do is not to put ourselves too low. It is enough to let her know that you like her. After all, relationships are not maintained by being moved.
The next thing everyone needs to do is to improve their own value:
① Pay attention to your own dressing, not to be exquisite, but to be clean and neat.
②Expand some sports interests and get out of your comfort zone.
③ Socialize effectively to keep yourself busy and improve your self-charisma.
The above three points are the most effective ways to solve the problem of girls not taking the initiative or rejecting you.
3. "Add more and more" openly
Sometimes a girl's concerns may be because of you, or they may come from herself. In fact, many girls easily fall into self-doubt, hesitation, and random thoughts when being pursued.
In fact, we don’t need to deliberately eliminate their thoughts. Everyone should have heard of the “threshold effect” in psychology.
Meaning: Once she accepts a small request from you, in order to avoid giving the impression of inconsistency, she may accept a larger request.
This is the fastest and most effective way for you to integrate into her life, and for her to integrate into your life.
For example, if you work together, ask a girl to bring you breakfast, ask her to help you sell a vacation, etc. Of course, we boys can't be too stingy, so we should give you something in return.
Step by step, I will give you a cup of milk tea, have a meal together, watch a movie with you, etc.
In this way, she will slowly replace you as her boyfriend. Believe me, girls think no less than you do.
Therefore, when the girl you like does not take the initiative or reject you, the first thing is to take the plunge and determine the basic position in her heart. Then there is prepared temptation and attraction, and finally guidance and dedication.
