Shyness has never been a privilege for girls. Even if many boys are usually fearless, they still have a shy and hesitant side in relationships. Especially when they meet a girl who is better than themselves, they always feel that they are She will not be worthy of her, and she obviously wants to pursue her but dare not ask her. What should you do in this situation?
Since you don’t dare to speak, then don’t speak, because a good girl will not speak because of your bravery, and she will agree to be with you. When together, girls often focus on "can you give them a sense of love?" And this feeling of love may come from many factors such as your appearance, talent, material conditions, emotional foundation, etc.
If you don’t take advantage of anything and only have courage, then it is reasonable for a girl to reject you.
Of course, it doesn’t mean that you have to hold back your secret love, but there is a better way than talking about love.
We who are chasing girls must always understand this truth: Confession is not a charge, but a ritual that creates attraction and then makes up for the promise.
So before you open your mouth, what you need to do is to make the girl like you as much as possible, and then use a tactful way to make up for the promise to confirm the relationship.
The sequence of attraction and confession is the key to determining the success of this pursuit. So, when you like an excellent girl but feel you are not worthy of her, what you need to do is:
1. Shape your own positive attraction
When people face a confession from the opposite sex, they will instinctively have a strong mentality, so people are more willing to accept each other's better confessions from the opposite sex. And you yourself feel that you are not as good as the other person, so it will definitely be difficult to succeed if you confess your love directly.
Therefore, the first thing you have to do is to make her notice you and at the same time develop a good impression of your existence. And you need to have a certain amount of leverage to interact with the other person so that the other person can feel your goodwill. It is not a one-way kneeling, licking and giving, but constantly attracting and guiding the other person to be willing to upgrade the relationship with you.
In terms of appearance, girls can like someone who is not handsome, but they absolutely cannot accept someone who is ugly. Of course, the ugliness here does not refer to a boy's innate genes, but to the self-shaping and control of his acquired image.
So at least make it neat, clean, and comfortable, so that girls can at least not reject you from a visual perspective.
A boy’s first visual impression often determines a girl’s initial favorable impression of you. If you give a girl the first impression of being sloppy and immodest, then it is very likely that the girl will treat you immediately. Putting you on the blacklist of love, no matter how hard you try in the future, it will not help.
The appearance determines whether the girl isBeing able to have a good impression of you, and your inner nature often determines how strongly a girl can have a good impression of you. This is what we call an "interesting soul."
What is interesting?
No matter whether a girl is excellent or not, if you want her to have a long-term crush on you, you must have at least one trait that attracts her besides appearance. .
Why do girls say “finding someone who understands you to fall in love with” every day, but do those who understand her really understand her?
In fact, those who really understand girls People who are more likely to have strong empathy abilities. So before pursuing a girl, try to understand the girl first. Start as a friend, quietly walk into and integrate into the girl's life, and understand the girl's habits, interests and little thoughts.
When you understand the girl’s psychological trends well enough, she will naturally develop a “feeling of tacit understanding with you.”
2. Upgrade the relationship step by step
In the early stages of pursuit, you should let go of your inferiority complex, and then step by step Test the girl's mind gradually and let her continue to accept your presence in a subtle way.
The first thing you have to do is to test the girl’s current acceptance of you.
·Beginner-level ordinary friends: I don’t exclude chatting with you, but only on superficial topics. If the sense of daily activities is low, the other person will not take the initiative to pay attention to your behavior, nor will he take the initiative to show his kindness to you. His attitude towards you is no different from that of other members of the opposite sex.
·Mid-level close friends: Will take the initiative to talk to you about their concerns, and at the same time do not exclude being alone with you. They have a high sense of daily interaction, but girls will also avoid suspicion involuntarily. He won't take the initiative to show his kindness to you, but his attitude towards you is obviously more enthusiastic than other people of the opposite sex.
·High-end prospective boyfriend: She will often find topics to chat with you, and she is also interested in your topics. At the same time, she will not refuse physical contact with you, including holding hands when crossing the street, gently holding your shoulders when going down the stairs, helping her tie her shoelaces, etc.
So if this girl is not interested in you in the first place, she must improve the relationship step by step, and avoid being eager for quick success, otherwise it will easily be in vain.
You have to do two things: First, let the other party enhance their sense of identity with you. The second is to integrate into the other person's life.
What is the sense of identification with your identity?
It requires a girl to become ideologically dependent on you, gradually get to know the girl, and let the girl subconsciously understand your identity. Friends→close friends→quasi-boyfriends are constantly over-accepting and accepting, making her gradually rely on your existence, and at the same time feel that your identity is irreplaceable.
Integrating into each other’s life circle at the same time is also a magic weapon to upgrade their relationship.
You can try to take the initiative to pick her up from get off work, watch movies and chat with her, and get to know her friends., over time you will become an important factor in her life, and your relationship will be upgraded with your little by little emotional penetration.
3. Let commitment replace reckless confession
The most common and most easily rejected way of confession is as follows :
"Can I be your boyfriend?" "Can you be my girlfriend?"
This way of confessing is actually making a confession for girls. It's a multiple choice question, so she has the right to agree with you, and she also has the right to reject you.
Even if the relationship is in place, the success rate of your confession is only 50-50 due to the girl's reserve, mood, and desire to continue to consider you.
Be clear that confession is not announcing that you want to possess the other person, but stating your feelings when you are with her and promising that you will be better to her.
Then at this time, the success rate of "replenishing the promise" is often higher than that of confession. Because commitment is often a one-way behavior and does not put pressure on girls, it is difficult for girls to refuse.
Having said so much good stuff, why don’t we get into the actual combat of “how to speak up and use promises instead of confessions”?
·“I think I have something that I must say today, from me When I first met you, I felt that you were different from other girls in my heart. I don’t know what happened recently. I began to think of you uncontrollably. You seemed to have settled in my heart, so you Can you give me a chance to take care of you?"
Commitment is actually not difficult. Many times, what girls don't want to accept is a possessive question like "Will you be my girlfriend?"
Rather, I want to hear your eloquent self-expression, so that girls can maintain their own reserve, and this committed confession ceremony will not make each other appear embarrassed, and girls will also be more willing Choose to accept it.
