Many people have pre-marriage anxiety. They have been in love with their partner for many years. They had already planned to get married, but they became anxious and unsure whether the other person was a suitable person for marriage.
This kind of anxiety will make people blindly search for answers. So the question is, after many years of love, how to judge whether the other person is suitable for marriage?
Only by not being afraid of things can you become more and more powerful in solving problems. Blind pursuit of stability will often lead you to risks.
Regarding how to deal with the uncertainty in marriage, here are some suggestions from the aspects of running a marriage and family and your own life.
First, when managing a marriage, you must pay attention to every contradiction and difference. This is an opportunity to practice your problem-solving skills and build a healthy relationship as a couple.
Most people have a way of thinking when it comes to relationships - don't have problems.
When a couple encounters conflicts and differences, in order to avoid quarrels, they subconsciously tolerate compromises, avoid communication, and whitewash peace.
It seems that the relationship has stabilized in front of us. In fact, this is a temporary solution to the current trouble with a bigger trouble, because this kind of care for feelings kills the anti-fragility of the relationship.
Both the couple lack the ability to solve problems, and they do not try to gain experience and master skills in practice. As a result, the marriage suffers. Don’t afford setbacks and lay minefields for the future.
The final explosion will definitely cause a larger and more irreversible rift, such as the straw that breaks the camel's back, or one or both parties seeking compensation and comfort from the extramarital affair.
Those couples who have a tacit understanding are not born in harmony, but have deepened their understanding and established a stronger sense of trust through the process of solving problems again and again.
They not only improved their problem-solving abilities, but also learned to cooperate. When they encounter greater difficulties and setbacks in the future, such couples will not be easily defeated, and their marriage will not easily collapse.
Second, manage your own life, don’t constantly look for certainty, but develop your risk resistance from uncertainty ability.
A good marriage still needs to be grasped, but from this uncertainty, we can accurately see that we need to plan in advance and enhance our ability to resist risks.
For example, with the support of your family, can you seek self-breakthrough in your favorite career field; for another example, can you study marriage and family psychology, learn more marriage management skills, and firmly bind the other party? heart.
Whether it is investing or managing a marriage, it is precisely because of conflict and uncertainty that we have the opportunity to become stronger and better.