Many men don’t know how to cherish their marriage. They don’t take their wives to heart. They accept their wife’s contribution to the family with peace of mind, but are unwilling to care and care for their wives. When their wives are frustrated, they will want to ask for help. divorce. So what should I do if my wife sues me for divorce and I don’t want to divorce her? How to redeem it? The following is a detailed analysis for everyone.
1. Understand the reasons why your wife wants a divorce
Maybe it is easy for a couple to break up because it only involves two people. But marriage is not a child's play, and divorce does not mean you can get divorced. There are many issues and factors that need to be considered. Moreover, the cost of divorce is very high, so wives generally will not initiate divorce easily unless the marriage has brought her too many disadvantages. Correspondingly, as long as a man reduces these disadvantages, his wife's desire for divorce will not be so determined.
However, many men simply do not understand what these disadvantages are, and do not know the reasons why their wives really want a divorce, so saving a marriage becomes a very difficult thing. To give a simple example:
Your wife has a new hairstyle that she likes very much, and she asks her husband if it looks good, but you say that she doesn’t know how to save and waste money, and she doesn’t know how to appreciate her beauty at all, and she can’t give it to her. Any compliments, will your wife still be willing to share her joy with you?
In the eyes of my wife, the shortcomings of marriage are not earth-shattering events, but these trivial matters accumulated over time, which kill the passion bit by bit. The marriage that should have been dull and happy ended up with quarrels, accusations, complaints, Nagging and ridiculing became habits. And none of you has the courage and strength to make changes first. When she realizes that two people are not as happy as one person together, even if divorce will bring a lot of losses, then she will not hesitate.
2. How to save a marriage
1. Reflect on each other and make changes
Feelings are a matter between two people, and no one party can completely absolve themselves of responsibility if something goes wrong. So after your wife files for divorce, you have to put aside all your attempts to get back together and think about the following three questions:
What kind of husband and marriage does she need?
What problems do you have?
What’s wrong with her?
Do a complete emotional review from the time you met until now. Your relationship pattern was formed bit by bit over time, so you need to carefully recall every quarrel and interaction you had.
2. Learn to express your needs correctly
Many people are not able to express their needs, but most of those happily married couples are good at expressing their needs. Why is expressing needs important? Because the essence of the relationship between the sexes is actually giving and taking, both husband and wife can understand each otherOnly when the needs of each other are met and can the needs of each other be met can the intimate relationship develop for a long time. Those couples who break up halfway are actually forced to terminate the relationship because their needs are not met in the relationship.
3. Lower your expectations for your partner
Many men may have too high expectations for their wives. Why do we have so high expectations for our partner when we unintentionally dislike our wives? Because we no longer have an independent self. Think about it, is that so? You feel that you have worked hard to earn money, paid a lot and sacrificed a lot for your family, so you will naturally have higher expectations for your wife and expect her to devote as much to your marriage and family as you do.
There are marriages that cannot be reconciled. This is because each of us has expectations and longings for life when we enter marriage. All you have to do is to let her see a better living situation and let her Seeing that being with you will only get better and better, your wife's thoughts of divorce will naturally slowly disappear. Being able to withstand the wait and live out yourself is the attitude of your marriage.
