Among single men, honest people make up a large part of the group. In fact, honest people also want to get rid of the "singles" group, but they can't find a girlfriend. Why is this?</ p>
You must know that in a love relationship, the vast majority of girls hope to be led by men, and hope that they will be regarded as It is a protected role, so that you can experience an unprecedented level of attention, security and impulse in the relationship. This is the "sense of love" that girls want to pursue.
However, honest people are on the contrary. In this kind of relationship between the sexes, it is often dominated by women, showing an intimate state in which women are strong and men are weak. And this kind of love state, from a psychological point of view, is abnormal, fragile, contrary to common sense, and difficult for girls to accept.
For today’s girls, love is no longer a necessity in life. Rather than falling in love with a tasteless person, it is better not to fall in love.
Behind the three words "honest man", it actually represents contemporary women's rejection of men who do not advocate, take the initiative, have no interest, have no opinion, and even are a bit useless.
This is not to say that contemporary women have become more realistic and have higher standards for choosing a spouse, but that with the increasing prosperity of the consumer era, everyone is actually paying more attention to their own love experience and feelings. At the same time, love is not Nowadays, it is a necessity for young people, so contemporary young people would rather not have love that has no sense of love.
Maybe some people think that "as long as an honest man is handsome and rich, girls will not abandon him."
To say a very cruel thing, honest men really can't use these words. Personal value will always tie up the heart of your partner. When your partner cannot experience the feeling of love with an honest person for a long time, he will instinctively choose to escape.
Here, I do not deliberately belittle you honest people, but I just want to say: "The label of honest people is really not an advantage in the relationship between the sexes. When you fall in love with an honest person, you will feel at ease. This is an outdated concept for most young people. Many times, your honesty will be the reason for your partner to leave you and betray you. ”
So, why is it so difficult for honest people to be liked by the opposite sex, and at the same time difficult to keep their partner’s heart for a long time?
The reason is simple, maintain The most critical factor in the relationship between the sexes is called need compensation.
The reason why an honest person is defined as an honest person is largely because "it is difficult for this person to understand the needs and emotions of others."
When a girl says it’s so cold, my hands are turning purple from the cold, an honest person will reply, “Well, it’s quite cold, and I’m freezing too”;
If a girl says which of these two clothes looks better, an honest person will reply, "Yeah, they both look pretty, you can choose for yourself.";
A girl will say, I don't have much appetite today, and an honest person will reply, "Yeah. , I don’t have much appetite either”...
In other words, when partners release their needs to honest people, these people often cannot discern the changes in the needs of the opposite sex. Not to mention how to give your partner your needs, so when a person's emotional needs are always not met in love, love fatigue and boredom will follow, and then separation and betrayal will follow.
This also explains "why men and women do not like to fall in love with honest people", because being with honest people does not feel like falling in love, but like "teaching a giant baby how to learn to love." The most basic social interaction.”
Nowadays, many people seem to be saying, "Honest people are suitable for marriage but not for falling in love. When you reach the age of marriage, you will naturally have no worries about getting married."
In fact, I found that "there are many unhappy people" In fact, in both men and women, there is more or less the shadow of honest people. In marriage, such honest people are often passive, negative, good to others, and able to withstand pressure.
But in the eyes of your partner, no matter how unpleasant this person is, or how you get along with him, he feels "life is hopeless"
And an honest person will most likely win the favor of his mother-in-law and be praised by others, "Look at how honest and honest that person in your family is, it's really heart-warming."
But in fact, being the wife of an honest person is a relief. When hearing this kind of praise, she would pretend to smile on the surface, but inside she was depressed and unspeakable.
Because she knew in her heart that “this is a marriage that seems to be inseparable, but in the eyes of others, Honesty seems to be the most lovable choice. But in fact, only you know that married life is tasteless, boring, and your needs are not satisfied. "
So I often say something:
"Honesty is really not a value-added item in a marriage relationship, and may even become a veto item for you in the eyes of most people. Because behind the label of an honest person, it is reflected that you are unable to meet the basic love needs of the opposite sex.
Don’t think that if you are rich and beautiful, it won’t hurt if you have an honest personality. The rate of cheating and cheating on honest people continues to rise every year. The so-called money and beauty really can’t lock a person’s heart. Isn’t this worthy of your reflection and change?”
Therefore The label "honest" really has nothing to show off. Even if you have money, education and many other added values, to be honest, if your partner does not feel the expectations, love and needs that should be in love, then the relationship will most likely fail.
For "honest people", if they want to seek self-change and self-healing, two particularly important points are: first.You must first understand the attributes of self-repression and know how to express your own love needs and desires.
The second thing is that in the relationship between the sexes, we must continue to learn that the needs are complementary, so that we can take care of the partner's emotions and provide the partner with the love needs.
Only by taking off the label of honest person can your partner continue to accept, recognize and rely on you, and at the same time, you can live your truest self in an intimate relationship.
